September 08, 2006

Men.....proceed at your own risk!!

This is Hilarious!

Never mind the ruff lingo, that's how we all feel at "that time of themonth"!!!

Dear Kotex,

I recently noticed that the peel-off strip of my pantiliner had abunch of "Kotex Tips for Life" on it. Annoying advice such as:
- Staying active during your period can relieve cramps.- Avoiding caffeine may help reduce cramps and headaches.

- Drink 6-8 glasses of water a day to keep you hydrated and feelingfresh.
- Try Kotex blah blah blah other productsObviously the individual behind this was someone who has neverpossessed a functioning set of ovaries.

Go ahead and tell a menstruating woman that drinking 6-8 glasses of water will help keep her feeling fresh. Seewhat happens and report back. I'll wait.While you're at it, dump out the coffee at work and remove thechocolate from the vending machine. I garan-friggin-tee that the firstresponders will be females who just ovulated. Look, females don't need or wanttips for living on feminine hygiene products. Younger girls are alreadyhearing "helpful" crap like that from their elderly relatives. Veteranfemales have already concocted their own recipes for survival, manycontaining alcohol.

Printing out shit advice while sneaking in ads for the brand that wasalready purchased is just plain annoying, not to mention rude, andenough to send a girl running to the Always brand. Mostly we'd like to forgetthat we even need these products. It's not a fun time, but DO NOT tryto cheer us up by adding smiley faces or bunnies or flowery cutesy crapto your products or the packaging. Put the shit in a plain brown wrapperso we can throw it in our carts discreetly and have it blend in among thewine and beer.

There is nothing more annoying than having a blindingpink package announcing your uterine state to everyone in the store. Sotake your tips for living and shove them right up your ass.
Ovarily Yours,

Miss PMS

1 Comment:

Swishy said...

LOL. That's classic!