October 13, 2006

Ever wonder..........

........what happens when Hallmark writers are having a bad day........


My tire was thumping. I thought it was flat
When I looked at the tire... I noticed your cat. Sorry! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Heard your wife left you.
How upset you must be.
But don't fret about it.
She moved in with me.
------------------------------------------------------------------

Looking back over the years that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder... "What the hell was I thinking?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband.
***************************************************

I've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love.
After having met you….I've changed my mind.
----------------------------------------------------------------

I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
That you're not here to ruin it for me. ####################################

Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go......
Would you like to take this knife out of my back?
You'll probably need it again.
**************************************************

Happy birthday!
You look great for your age.
Almost Lifelike!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When we were together, you always said you'd die for me.
Now that we've broken up, I think it's time you kept your promise.
(....this one made me howl.....)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We have been friends for a very long time ..... let's say we stop?
(....another personal favourite.....must be the mood I am in!!!)
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I'm so miserable without you it's almost like you're here.
======================================

Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

4 peeps just sayin':

greymatters said...

Too funny!

Drew Blackstone said...

Here are two that I came up with:

Roses are red
Violets are blue
You don't have to be a poet
To write a good greeting card

Violets are blue
Roses are red
It's a bummer dude
That your dog is dead

Do you think they'll hire me?

Swishy said...

Funny!

Ramblin Rose said...

too funny I love these where do you find all this good stuff??

rr